Good Advice on Having Sex on the First Date

First dates can be full of excitement, anxiety, and anticipation. It is very common for a first date to be somewhat awkward and uncomfortable, but what if it isn't? What if on your first date you hit it off so well that you want to spend the night together? There are many health and safety warnings against having sex on the first date, but if you decide to here are a few do's and don'ts you ought to consider.

DO: Do Plan Ahead

Whether or not you think you may end up having sex on a first date, plan ahead. Make sure you plan to use contraception such as a condom so that you don't end up in a situation where you may end up practicing unsafe sex and expose yourself to sexually transmitted diseases or pregnancy.

Also, it is good common sense to let a trusted friend or relative know who you will be going out with, and a way to be in contact in case of an emergency. If the date is going well, and you think you may be spending most of the evening with your date, try to excuse yourself for a short time to let your contact person know.

First dates are full of unknowns, so you don't want to find yourself in a situation where you feel unsafe or in danger with no safety plan. Planning ahead can ease some of the anxiety you may have, and leave you free to relax, have fun, and make good decisions.

DON'T: Don't Have Unrealistic Expectations

Sex can complicate a new relationship. If you're choosing to have sex on a first date, you're basically deciding to share the most intimate type of physical connection with someone you may not know very well. This creates the opportunity for a lot of mixed emotions. Therefore, it's essential that if you're going to have sex on the first date, you have to have realistic expectations. Just because a person has sex with you, no matter what they've told you beforehand, doesn't mean they want to continue a relationship with you. You have to be prepared for the fact that the relationship may or may not progress, depending on whether or not your date felt some sort of "spark" or emotional connection with you. At the end of the day, men and women alike need more than just sex to decide that they want to be in a relationship with someone.

If you decide to move forward physically this quickly, remind yourself that most of why you're likely drawn to this person is physical chemistry, not because of a deep emotional connection or history. Keeping this in mind can help you separate your emotions, and maintain realistic expectations.

DO: Do Stay True to Yourself

It is very common for people to get caught up in the excitement of a first date and find themselves falling or getting pressured into situations they didn't really want to be in. Trust your gut! If something doesn't feel right about taking a first date into the sexual arena, then don't do it.

If you betray yourself by doing something you don't really want to do you will end up feeling vulnerable, unsafe, and resentful. Know your boundaries when it comes to having sex, especially on a first date, and stick to those boundaries. Choosing to have sex on the first date can be risky. Be clear about your values and priorities and communicate your expectations clearly. Clear expectations if you want to keep things between you and your date simple and positive.

DO: Don't Make Rash Decisions

While you want to have fun on first dates, you have to be smart about having sex if you want to prevent yourself from having regrets. Don't wait until the end of the evening when you've had a few drinks to ask yourself whether or not you want to have sex. Evaluate your date throughout the evening, and try to make the decision about sex well before the opportunity arises. You want to feel comfortable and sure about having sex on the first date in order to maintain some feeling of control, so that you can keep any boundaries you may have.

Pulling off having sex on a first date successfully, without issues, can be tricky. You have to think things through, follow your boundaries, and communicate clear expectations if you want to keep things between you and your date simple and positive. It won't be easy, because you're bound to have some complicated emotions come into play. However, if you can learn to manage this, and create a situation that works for both of you, you may just be able to have the ultimate first date.

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